Saturday, September 18, 2010

Staying In Love by Dating Your Spouse


When I polled you to find out what you'd like to hear about this month, more than a few of you mentioned wanting to hear about ways to increase love and strengthen the relationship between husband and wife.  Well, our next blogger is prepared to do just that!  She has written some very candid posts about husband/wife relations that you might want to explore after reading this.

Please welcome Jackie of House of Sarager!



In my former life and as a non-parent, I was a special ed teacher.

Special ed teachers do a lot of things well, but one thing they do REALLY well is take data.

For everything.

And you know what?  They see progress. 

For everything.

*******

Early on in our relationship, Lincoln and I, like many others, said we would have a date every Friday.

What we didn't say was, "This is what a date looks like to me ________"

(For Lincoln, watching a movie together is a date. For me it is not.)

Recently we sat down and made a plan of how "dating" was going to work for us.
We made some "Date Rules"
*Lincoln plans one Friday, I plan the next Friday.
*The majority of our dates are 'home dates' due to the scarcity of babysitters/funds.
*There will be no TV or Computer from the time the kids go to bed until the end of the date. 
           (Because once one of us gets started 'just five more minutes' has turned into the whole evening.)
*No doing the same thing more than once a month.

******

Data.

What I am not suggesting is that you make a data chart to check off your dates. (Unless you want to, then by all means.)

What I am suggesting is that instead of setting a lofty goal to date your spouse while doing nothing about it, you instead make a plan for how you will make it happen.

What will it look like?
Who will plan it?
How often will you do it?

You will be surprised by what a difference a small effort will make.

Let me remind you, "When performance is measured, performance improves. When performance is measured and reported, the rate of improvement accelerates"   Thomas S. Monson







And tune in Sunday when I announce the winners of this week's party favors!




Custom Family Tree for Kids - 8x10 print
a custom family tree for children displaying four generations of family names
Para Siempre print, LDS Temple font
an 11x14 print of "Para Siempre" using LDS Temple Font
Description:  "Para Siempre", means "Forever". The font is made exclusively of LDS temple parts. This print can be personalized with your family name and established/sealing date." 
by Pseuzyn's Shop

LDS QUAD scripture cover PURPLE, BLACK and GREY

a quad Scripture Cover from To Jameson With Love


a customizable Family Proclamation Photo Album
It includes words from the entire Proclamation...You just insert your own family photos!

I BELONG handstamped baptism necklace

"I Belong" hand-stamped baptism necklace
Description:  "I BELONG 2010 stamped on one inch nickle silver disc. Attached to 24 inch silver plated ball chain. Chain may be cut down to shorter size. This item is designed with creativity and is custom hand stamped especially for you! That is what makes each piece unique." by Just Be Jewelry

Birthday Countdown- balloons

Birthday Countdown Blocks
This item helps you countdown 31 days until a birthday.  Lettering is customizable.

Expandable LDS Temple Tote with outside pocket (Black and White Houndstooth)

Expandable Temple Tote Pattern in PDF 
(There will be 2 Winners of this pattern!!)

20 comments:

  1. great ideas and it continues even after you are empty nesters and retired. I like dates with my hubby after many years of marriage....fun positive post.

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  2. What a great reminder! Definitely need to do more date nights at our house.

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  3. we have so many dates now that we are empty nesters....all sorts of dates. suddenly, unexpectedly, and planned

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  4. What a nice looking couple and I wish I had a nice gentlman to go on dates with...awhhhh...the gift of love...many have it and a few of them appreciate it...we must love and be loved.

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  5. Such good advice! Gives me some things to think about. :~)

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  6. Great ideas! We need to make this more of a priority. I think I'll email this link to my husband right now! lol

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  7. Oh, I love this. Thanks for all your kind comments everyone!

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  8. AMEN, sistuh! If I get time, I'm going to take pictures of my Family Proclamation "craft" - a date night file! PERFECT!

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  9. Dating is SO important! Even just a walk on a beautiful night, such an important thing to take time for.

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  10. My husband and I went on a date last night and loved it. We need to remember how much fun we have so we can make a committment to go out more often.

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  11. Love this. Solid, specific suggestions. Love it.

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  12. I love the idea of setting up some rules to make date nights more successful. We're guilty of repeating the same dates over and over again.

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  13. Ooh, I really want to see that date file!

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  14. I love it! Thanks for the advice.

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  15. Great ideas! Now to make it happen . . .

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  16. Ahhh! This post was SO great for me to read. Ever since I had my last baby my husband and I have TOTALLY been in the "lets stay in and watch a movie" rut for EVERY date!!!
    This was good... now I just need to wait till he gets home from deployment! This just makes me more excited for his return!
    -CK

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  17. This is true of all goals. Making them is grand, but unless you make a plan to do it, they are worthless. I am a data geek, so making it all in a list makes sense to me!

    I do need to work on making date night more than a night at the movies (although we are both boring, so it kinda works right now).

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  18. It's true. You really have to consciously set aside that special time for each other. And then make something happen!

    =)

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