I taught a YW lesson yesterday, and I ended up pulling out about five old journals and reading some randomly picked entries to the girls from my high school & college days.
There were things that I read that I had completely forgotten about. There were things that I wrote about that made me think, "I am still that same girl." My perspective is the same.
And other things that left me feeling that I can't reconcile who that carefree girl is with who I am today. I should know best, but sometimes I wonder, how in the world did I get here? And how did my life take the course that it has? Does anyone else ever feel this way?
Just feeling contemplative today I guess. Thinking about what was, what wasn't, what could have been...what could be.
As Easter approaches, I find myself turning my heart and mind toward the Atonement, the most important event in all of human history. I find myself wanting to find out once again whether the Atonement really does cover all pain. I want to know. And I need to know.
And I hope to find out.
I hope you find out, too. Of course, you already know that "yes" is the answer, but I hope you feel it all the way to your bones. (I hope I feel it, too!)
ReplyDelete=)
PS. One thing's for certain, you don't LOOK much different...
The answer to that question is yes, but sometimes you have something you need to learn from it first. That is a very fun picture, sometimes it is fun to look back. :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful site you've created! I've been searching for something
ReplyDeletelike this for a long time! I just wanted to share my little
contribution to the LDS community. I'm creating lap/quiet books for
each month that follow the Sharing Time theme. I'm sharing them at
GospelLearningOnYourLap.wordpress.com
I hope you will check them out and help me share them with others.
I know just what you mean. I will be turning 38 next week and find myself having the same thoughts... always reconciling the 'now' me with the 'then' me. It's strange.
ReplyDeleteI ponder on the Atonement so much now. That seems to be the only place I find comfort most of the time. I know you KNOW... because I feel it too, but sometimes it would be nice to really comprehend the vastness of it all, huh? Somehow wishing that finite part of us could just go away for one brief moment so that we could truly know. Anyway... I understand what you are saying.
old journals reveals lots about our journey...
ReplyDeleteA lovely thoughtful post! Oh, the wisdom we find through the years. I often comtemplate about my life too. My journals give me a perspective of who I was then and how far I have come from those early years. Enjoy the moments of learning more about the Atonement. I think this is a lifetime pursuit.
ReplyDeleteI taught this lesson as well yesterday and I pulled out my journal and wrote in it today. First time in almost a year. I love journaling because it gives us a moment to reflect and ponder as we write.
ReplyDeleteOnly thing I could think of was this:
ReplyDeleteFrom Richard G. Scott's April 2010 General Conference address:
There
is an imperative need for each of us to strengthen our understanding
of the significance of the Atonement of Jesus Christ so that it will
become an unshakable foundation upon which to build our lives. As the
world becomes more devoid of foundational standards and as honor,
virtue, and purity are increasingly cast aside in the pursuit of
appetite, our understanding of and faith in the Atonement of Jesus
Christ will provide strength and capacity needed for a successful life.
It will also bring confidence in times of trial and peace in moments
of turmoil. I energetically encourage you to establish a
personal study plan to better understand and appreciate the
incomparable, eternal, infinite consequences of Jesus Christ’s perfect
fulfillment of His divinely appointed calling as our Savior and
Redeemer. Profound personal pondering of the scriptures accompanied by
searching, heartfelt prayer will fortify your understanding of and
appreciation for His priceless Atonement. Another powerful way to
learn of Jesus Christ and His Atonement is through consistent temple
attendance.http://lds.org/general-conference/2010/04/he-lives-all-glory-to-his-name?lang=eng
Also you should listen to this and watch too. http://www.therhouse.com/beautiful-heartbreak/
ReplyDeleteI've seen that...just beautiful....thanks for the quote too and understanding!
ReplyDeleteEaster has been on my mind since the beginning of January. I really want to feel the power of the atonement this year.
ReplyDeletefind someone who will lend you Mediation and the Atonement by John Taylor...or you can borrow mine...for you study
ReplyDeleteYes, I feel that way too from time to time. Life gets a lot more complicated when you "grow up" it seems. I also believe with my whole heart that the atonement covers ALL pain. I know it! So I just keep swimming. May you get the answers your seeking for again and again and again, and just keep swimming. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for giving me the opportunity to turn MY heart and mind to the Atonement. I testify that the Atonement DOES cover all pain. It even covers the times that we doubt the Atonement and the times that we wonder "
ReplyDeleteThinking about what was, what wasn't, what could have been...what could be."
You are not alone in those feelings. I've been there and think all of us have been there, including the Savior. He KNOWS EXACTLY what you are feeling and thinking because he experienced it firsthand so that you won't ever have to wonder if "anyone else ever feel this way?"
One of my favorite talks on the Atonement is by Brad Wilcox: His Grace is Sufficient.
http://byutv.org/watch/49475abb-10d4-4f45-a757-7000b9945468
Love to read you every day... Thanks!