Daddy Lessons

My husband has taught my children many useful lessons.

I recently started writing them down...for posterity's sake.

Here are some of the most poignant things that my husband has taught my kids:

HOW TO EAT AN ANT:

More accurately, he taught them to eat ants. That's right friends, when my children find an ant on the sidewalk, their normal reaction now is to pop it in their mouth!  Needless to say, in a survival situation, my children will probably never starve.

HOW TO CREATE A TSUMANI:

So, we were enjoying a nice dip in my friend's baby pool on Friday, and my son starts kicking water all over the place.  I ask what he is doing.  He says, "I'm making a tsunami!!"  I ask, first of all, how do you even know what a tsunami is?  "Daddy taught me."  Of course.  Sorry about the slightly disturbing photo, but I'm pretty sure this is what his tsunami looked like to the other toddlers in the pool!

HOW TO (properly) FLICK A RUBBER BAND

Later that same day, we were eating dinner, and my son attempts to shoot a rubber band using his fingers.  Instead of asking him to put it away until after dinner, my husband say, "hold on, let me show you just how this is done," and he proceeds to give him a tutorial on flicking rubber bands right there at the dinner table.

Proof that there is no time like the present for a genuine teaching moment.

(A side note: Don't let my husband see this...or your husband, for that matter:)

It's a "fully-automatic rubber band machine gun".  The website says that "each machine gun is beautiful hand crafted", holds 144 rubber bands and looks and shoots just like an old western Gatling Gun.  It is billed as "the ultimate weapon in the office rubber band flicking war", but I could see it doing some serious damage on the home front as well.

Like I said, I should've started this list a long time ago, because it just goes on and on:  

how to hammer a nail

tie a knot

throw a frisbee

ride a bike

wrestle

run a race

roast a marshmallow

build stuff

plant stuff

pick out a Christmas tree

pee "in the wild"

jump on a trampoline

shoot an arrow

slow dance

dig holes

sit still in church

blow the wrapper off a straw

build a birdhouse

lick an ice cream cone

play hide & seek

catch a fish
catch a frog
make a snowman

enjoy a thunderstorm

catch fireflies

wear sunscreen

play the banjo

run in the wind

eat waffles

throw a water balloon

work hard

play hard

Do my kids look happy?  They are.  Thanks to their wonderful, loving Daddy!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!