Thursday, February 12, 2015

50 Shades of Lies


I watched a brief clip of 50 Shades of Grey last night on Jimmy Fallon, so I could be a little more informed about the book/movie before giving my opinion. In the scene, the female is renegotiating the terms of her sexual contract with the male. They are sitting very far from each other at a dinner table. He says, “…so you’re saying that you want to leave (the relationship)?” She says, “Yes.” He says, “But your body is telling me something different.” So, let me get this straight. “Your words are telling me No. This stack of papers that you refuse to sign is telling me no. But your body, which is sitting far away from me in a modest/retreating pose, is TELLING ME YES.” This IS rape talk, if I’ve ever heard it…and yes, I’ve heard it. I cannot imagine anyone who has actually been victimized or abused or mistreated or manipulated into staying in an unhealthy intimate relationship could ever stomach a movie like this. Out of respect for myself and any other woman out there who has ever been victimized I will speak up and say, don’t see this movie.

Don’t buy into the lie that this is normal, good, acceptable behavior among “consenting” adults. Don’t buy into the lie that seeing this movie won’t damage YOUR OWN SELF-ESTEEM and change the way you feel you are perceived by men and society. Don’t buy into the lie that this movie’s acceptance by society won’t severely jeopardize a woman’s credibility when she SAYS NO (and lower the chances of her NO being respected and accepted by her aggressor).

Celebrating and glorifying the rape mentality, casting women’s bodies as “things” that can be “contractually signed over” to men for a period of time, will (and does) harm our society. Women and girls are sold into sex slavery every day, and I find it deeply saddening and offensive that as a culture we would seek entertainment in a practice that, in reality, enslaves and damages the lives of so many women, children, and men both here and abroad. Don’t tell the lie. Don’t sell the lie. DON’T BUY THE LIE.